LA Times Laker Blog: Kwame Brown is Bored
oh that Kwame - so funny
From AOL’s The Fan House - Kwame Brown and Phil Jackson are not best friends:
Phil Jackson on Kwame’s 3 TOs in an OT loss:
“Godspeed, Kwame-hating blogger. But please, post a link to the story where he makes soggy his keys to success.”
Ask and you shall receive.
The Sports Bog is one of my favorite blogs, so you can imagine my delight when I received this text message this afternoon from my friend Tony: “dude, you made the sports bog!”
So true.
IM from my friend Rowe:
” an hour ago someone brought in cake
for a celebration everyone was celebrating some shit
i amused myself by thinking of me running up, smashing the cake and yelling “KWAME BROWN!!!” and how zero people would get it “
Kwame is like a cake in so many ways: soft, indulgent, flaky, sweet, and very bad for you. Plus if you overheat him, he will collapse like a delicate souffle!!
From an ESPN Page 2 Article about Kobe Bryant: Hangin’ with the Kobes.
Talking about Kobe playing NBA 07 for the Playstation:
And, conspiracy theorists stop there. Don’t think for a second that Kobe is tanking it. In fact, as a virtual Ben Wallace deftly drives the lane on Kobe’s D, he’s starting to get peeved.
“Yo, this ain’t right!” Bryant says. “Ben Wallace can’t handle the ball! If he can handle it, Kwame can handle it.”
Kwame can’t. When Kobe tries to penetrate with Brown, he’s picked clean. There’s more yapping, and now I’m just feeling bad for the guy.
Finally, Bryant determines he’s had enough. Too much losing. Far too much talking. Bryant has begun taking whispered instructions from a Sony technician.
So, yeah, Kobe’s cheating. And it’s working. Kobe’s Kwame hits a fadeaway and Vladimir Radmonivic hits back-to-back 3s.
“Oh no, I’m getting my swagger now,” says Bryant, just before Smush Parker throws down a two-handed jam. Bryant saves face with a respectable loss.
“I played as a kid,” says Bryant, talking up what he calls “ruthless” competition with cousins back in the day. “Back then, I was always surprised to see Mark Price dunking. John Stockton doing a windmill. But this game gets it right. Smush was running the offense pretty good and Vlad played true to form. He can shoot in real life, and he can shoot in the game. The game is pretty realistic.”
Right, and Kwame hits many clutch turnaround jumpers over Rasheed Wallace. Happens all the time.
Kobe laughs and bows his head. “Let’s just say that was a good sign,” he says.
Kwame makes it too easy…seriously, this is just a gift.
Brown won’t be prosecuted in cake heist (ESPN)
Kwame Brown Has No Concerns About Excess Flour Intake (Deadspin)
Sometimes, we just don’t have to say anything, other than, well, this must have been what Michael Jordan had in mind when he drafted him.
Kwame Brown hates celebratory pastries (Yay Sports!)
“We kinda feel like someone took our brain and then snuck it into real life and made the following happen.”
Another Classic Kwame article from Michael Wilbon, written the week Kwame was traded to the Lakers for he who should be an All Star - Caron Butler.
By Michael Wilbon
Saturday, July 16, 2005; Page E01
Highlites:
THE classic Kwame Brown Article - from the washington post’s Sally Jenkins.
Growing Pains
Kwame Brown’s Unsentimental Education
Highlites:
- “If you draft me, I’ll never disappoint you,”
- There was the time they discovered that he was eating Popeyes fried chicken for every meal, including breakfast, because he didn’t really know how to grocery-shop.
- One morning before a Wizards game, Brown called Lopez, and said, “I have nothing to wear. Everything’s dirty.” Lopez knew Brown had a closet full of new suits – he had helped hang them there. “Kwame,” he explained, “you have to take those suits to the dry cleaners.” That was fine, Brown said, but he didn’t know how to do that, and he still didn’t have anything to wear. Lopez drove over to Brown’s apartment, and found the suits in a heap by the bed. Each time Brown wore one, he would take it off, wad it up and throw it in a corner.
I’m a Wizards/Bullets fan who is still upset that we wasted a #1 pick on Kwame Brown. It’s not just that he sucked as a basketball player, he never really tried to get better and he quit on the team in the playoffs. (calling in sick…that bastard). I should have started this site 3 years ago. Better late than never. This blog will solely consist of links to stories about Kwame Brown sucking as a basketball player or as a person.
Oh and Ernie Grunfeld is the greatest GM ever for trading him away for Caron Butler - who should be an all star.
